Hope Against Hope

"Hope against Hope"


He'll never change
not even for me.

It’s kinda hard to let go
but now I know

I hoped against hope, and still
he doesn't know
that I still love him so.

I was waiting, not giving in,
still his stubborn mind
could not accept
that his pride must be let go

I waited for him to want me back,
but instead of starting over,
he just hit me with words that hurt me so.

He went off and found
a younger, much younger lover,
a gold digger in his school.
He will never change,
and that hurts much more.

I’ve tried to elope, to cope with him.
Yet nothing's changed.

All those years,
my tears have been wasted,
ignored, taken, and shunned away.

For years I’ve been giving, living for him
and only him.
Yet he's never been honest,
loyal, and denies everything
that stains his name.

I’m sorry for my mistakes,
for my children to suffer for my sake.

I’m sorry for hoping,
that my destiny would change.
But now I know, that
hope is beautiful, frightening
and betraying.

Although hope is an illusion,
something I look forward to,
with fear that it may not be fulfilled.
I will not stop
hoping against hope.

for mom